Thanks Eugene. Your eye for detail is great.

I am wanting the reader to gleen the idea of who the Church is and what the EA is doing with them from the other stories ( DG's and CV's)...I was thinking the reader would have already read their's and if I keep going on and on it would just re-hash what they have already found.

I also had spoken with DG about the book. Of it not just having something in it that Harrison wants but also something he doesn't even know it has, and that is mention of Davison's wife. We had talked about Nik having more than just a blood line, but some other reason she wants to get into the old Capital Office or city too.

And as far as you not really understanding why Nik is having the dreams and being confused, that is a good thing, as that is just what I want the reader to feel. I want the reader to feel as confused inside as Nik is feeling. You are being primed for the rest of the story, as I am NOT DONE yet, but only about two thirds through it.

I also had put that the legend of Davison was handed down orally, not through books. We had also discussed at the meeting before this last one, that Davison has been gone so long, that his life has morphed more into legend and there are things about him that are in the consciousness of the public that may not be exact, just as the legen dof Robin Hood and other long dead heros of old in our own lore today. But, there are things that Mraz knows and is about to tell Nik that are very true and that is where the next part of the story is going to go.

DG, have you read the end notes to my last draft yet? I would like your ideas about what to do with Nik's connection to Davison and do you think the idea that his wife was really from another planet ( not known at all to any human except his descendants) and that the mention of this secret also lies within the pages of the book? That the reason Nik is having the so-called "seizuers" is not that she is ill, in human undersanding, but that her alien blood is being awakened so do something awesome for human kind?

Oh man! If I change my train of story now, right in the middle of character developement, I might as well start all over, Eugene!

Nik does NOT KNOW who she is yet. She is at the top by her OWN military prowess and merrit, not because she KNOWS who she is. Just like the reader, she has no idea that she is anything special at all. She will find out at the same time the reader does.

And DG and I DID discuss this with the whole group at a meeting...I believe it was three meetings back...the night Whiggy was at the concert and DG was officiating the meeting that night. Perhaps, I don't remember, you were not there or late?? Not sure.

I am in the process of adding much more to the beginning, and I was even before you sent me your comments.

Lets see....okay, how about this: You guys let me re-write the beginning the way I see it...read it when it's all finished ( should take me the rest of the weekend) then I'll post it up on Boxnet...then you can pick it apart! Ha!

Please refer back to CV's suggestion before today's discussion. And here also is what Whig sent me from an email dated today:

"Good work, lady!"

I'm just foolin' around!

I don't want any drama at all, guys...we'll get this character centered.

I just have one thing to say...She is NOT a female Luke Skywalker, She is in NO WAY related to Kira Starbuck, Nik is a new and unique character placed in a new and unique story and that is what we want, right? Who wants people reading this story or any of it's characters and rolling their eyes and saying...oh that's just like so-in-so!?

I haven't had a chance to read your new version, TDC, but since you're still writing and you said you've read mine, I wanted to let you know that I would be open to the attack on the airship at the end of my story be the resistance rather than Prescott's people. I didn't want to do that without discussing it with you and DG, but if it works with what you have going, it might be kind of a cool tie-in.

Thanks guys! I really needed the direction. You are so right Eugene...I am working ( re-working) the beginning and I will most deffinately have Nik introduced to the reader and her motives for who and what she is!

I will think about your suggestion as well CV...that is very generous of you and it would help tie a little link to your chapters too. A small weave in the tapistry that flows around or through each chapter is a plus!

See you guys after I come up for air!!

I can't seem to open the newest version, which says it's WordPerfect (.wpd). It's weird because I've always been able to open your previous documents.

Okay, Eugene sent me a .doc version, so I was able to open it. In addition to some of the things Eugene mentioned above about Nik, I have some notes about the relationship between the Church and the Eastern Alliance. A few weeks ago, you, DG, and I talked about this since we were all playing in the same sandbox, so to speak, and this is the way I understood it to be following our conversation (and DG can either back me up on this, or tell me I'm off base): The Eastern Alliance is the government that has a stranglehold on its people, and that is the institution that people view as being oppressive and evil. Most people see the Church of Rachnaea as a good thing, and believe that its influence within the government actually tempers its cruelty.

What the people don't know is that the Church is actually behind most of the oppressiveness, and that the leaders of the Church have much more influence within the government than anyone expects. They also have a secret plan to take over everything that began with the sabotage of the FTL drive on the moon. One of the over-arching themes of our book, as far as I can remember, is that our characters are going to discover and fight against this plot.

Now, your characters in the Resistance may know the truth about the Church being behind the curtain in all of this, but that is in no way clear in your story. As far as I can remember, you don't even mention the Eastern Alliance at any point (other than the scene from earlier with the ships). I think this can be fixed fairly simply by adding a few lines here and there, but I think that fixing it is crucial to our overall story.

I'm not criticizing your writing in any way, because it's good. I just think it's really important that we clear this stuff up.

-CV

Thanks CV...and you're absolutely right on! The Resistance does know what the over all "believing" population doesn't know.

I agree all the way with fleshing it out more and expalining more of the story...and that's what I put on my end notes, as the story is not any where near done yet. I am researching and working up an even better beginning, planning on posting it as soon as I have it done.

I was hoping today (Monday) but the fates didn't have it that way for me. Real world barged right in and stole most of my writing time today!

I hope to have more before the meeting, but probably won't have it posted up before then. If I make it at all, as I am feeling kinda FLU-like tonight ! Yikkers!!

I know we have already spoke and discussed about our stories as of June first. But I just wanted to be sure that everyone knows mine is under the third draft file on BoxNet and the title now is THE RESISTANCE. This is the most recent and updated version of my story to date.

I still have a ways to go to get this to a point where it's a good place to stop...as Sally...I just keep digging deeper and haven't reached a place in my mind that's a good place to jump off...

Any comments are welcome!

And DG and CV! Be sure to read it all the way through, as I believe it runs pretty much along the same time line as yours and if we are thinking about the interweaving approach, perhaps my story lines can be woven in there someplace.

G10Ninja: What do you think in your ultimate wisdom? tee hee...

DG...I am wondering too about the "twins" scenerio. Perhaps my bad guy ( the double agent from The Church) might get his zeal to prove himself because he finds his true family is actually that twin?